"all for the juice."

i just finshed watching the girl next door. it's been more than a year since i've seen it which is crazy because it's one of my favorites. and yes...i was studying at the same time. trust me it's possible. i remember when i first watched this movie. i was inspired to watch it because it apparently had footage of an ideal kiss (and it does actually). but the real reason why i bring up the fact that i watched this movie tonight is because i first watched it more than two years ago and it came at a point where i was weeks away from getting into a relationship...one that took me away from the single life for quite some time. being single now years later hasn't been significantly different from how it was then until i saw the prom scene during the movie. back in the day...prom and other high school dances were a big thing and just the memories and such created during those times were very influential in relationships. it was one of the most romantic experiences you could have if you were aiming for it. now...high school is way back in the past and romantic experiences or dating opportunities are a little harder to come by. oh sure...i can still go out with a girl to watch a movie or have a nice, intimate dinner but that's something i was already doing awhile ago. going on surprise adventures, all-day getaways, beach trips, picnics...the things i'm doing now are the same things that i was doing at an younger age. what i've come to remember/realize tonight is that the difference is not in what you do...but who you are now and what you make of the experience. those two things matter more now than before. you could literally make a girl swoon with a surprise or make her fall in love by dancing away the night with her back then. people seemed to care a lot more about how good the "presentation" of the date and the person than the actual substance of the two (i hope you can understand that concept...otherwise this whole entry is lost to you). i can get a lot more out of a movie night or an impromptu dinner now because there's more focus on the people involved and what you do for that other person. and by what you do...i don't mean gifts and such. i mean you investing your time, your energy, your whole self into another person even if it's for a moment. instead of just talking about how beautiful a girl was, how she would make a great girlfriend because she's so nice, or how her hands and mine together are a perfect fit...i can find myself talking more about how her abilities, desires, likes and dislikes, and such define her as a person and could potentially define me and a possible relationship. one's character shows more and there's more weight to even the subtlest move. there's a lot more maturity now that really refines the connection between two people (i would have said that was obvious but not everyone that gets older grows up). with all this in mind...dating in the present time and finding a healthy, lasting relationship requires much more investing and is a lot more challenging...but it's a lot more satisfying and definitely better. there's no more room for playing games or portraying a modern-day cassanova. it's time to be a lot more real, sophisticated, and mature. otherwise...the juice will never be worth the squeeze.