"so anxious."

after months of anticipation and planning...
the day has come: the nike+ human race 10k!

"laying it down."

in the past 72 hours...i ate at gyu-kaku (finally after so long) with daynee (haven't seen her since my birthday) then watched tropic thunder (so not worth it...it wrecked my mind for the rest of the day), got some much needed adoration at the chapel, watched matt maher (freakin' amazing performance...you seriously missed out if you weren't there) with austin, tiff, marc, dennis, katrina s, and angelica at scrc, had some (long overdue) molcasalsa, had a personal adventure in la (much needed galavanting therpapy), and got ready for the human race (it's tomorrow! chyeah!).

"i will rather boast most gladly of my weaknesses, in order that the power of Christ may dwell with me. therefore, i am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and constraints, for the sake of Christ; for when i am weak...then i am strong" - 2 corinthians 12: 9-10

that quote is definitely what i needed to read.

much love and props to katharine and seraph 7! much props on the designs!

"fallout boy."

i got some serious regulation from my instructor at clinicals...and afterward i found out that someone backed up into my car. i haven't slept well for the past couple of days and i haven't been doing the best at school either due to my tiredness and lack of focus. it's a mix of me pushing myself too hard to get things done and me managing my time poorly...not a good combination at all. this week was off to a promising start but has now become one of the most challenging and worst weeks of the year thus far. i don't think i have ever reached my physical or mental limit but i might do so in the next couple days...with exams to study for and take, a project to work on, and a race to run. i'm definitely glad it's labor day next monday and i won't have school so i can rest. however...it's going to be a struggle just to make it to that day. i need to remember...it takes a little hurt to get a lot of love.

"diana ross status."

the work begins anew.
the hope rises again.
and the dream lives on.
- sen. edward kennedy

so sen. kennedy was able to make it out to the dnc today with help and examination from his medical staff and doctors in denver. i'm very happy he got to do so and he gave a really great speech...one i thoroughly enjoyed while i worked out at the gym. in a matter of minutes...i feel as if he has inspired me for the rest of my life. no joke. i feel more invigorated to be a part of this nation. that my nursing career, family obligations, relationships with friends and such, and my work in relation to my faith enriches and strengthens the American spirit. i have to be passionate about the ideals i feel this country should be all about and live with pride and honor that i have "American" attached to the Chinese-Filipino of my nationality. i am a US citizen, an American...and i'm lovin' it.

although he spoke in a political sense...i am encouraged to emanate kennedy's thoughts on this fall being "the season of hope" in every part of my life. so much needs to be "rennovated" in this life of mine, including myself. this fall...i'm going to truly live up to my year resolution of being "harder, better, faster, stronger." i'm going to learn more, grow more, see more, and do more. style, faith, love, knowledge, awareness, swagger...it's all going to change for good. i'll try new things and develop new passions, get back into and improve upon old hobbies, and somehow, someway manifest the change i want and need in myself.

of course...it's also time to just shut up and just do it. for real real, not for play play.

"namaste."

i went to disneyland yesterday afternoon with tiff to meet up with my friend jenny and her friends rosaline and greg...only for them to leave when we arrived haha. regardless...we spent the rest of the day and night there. it was a fun time and it was great to go one last time before my pass expires. enjoyed some long overdue dole whip and monte cristo sandwiches w/ pommes frites. toy story midway mania is incredibly fun! space mountain...better than ever. peter pan is a shorter ride than previously thought. all in all...this disneyland trip was a much needed stress reliever and break from all the busyness (i don't care if that isn't a real word) of my life. i won't be getting a disney pass any time soon but for sure there's going to be a dland trip this Christmas.

i finally bought running shoes...air max moto 6+. the great thing about them is that the ones i bought are the lance armstrong/live strong verison so not only are they in black and yellow but the entire proceeds goes to the lance armstrong foundation to help out cancer patients. not just a portion of the purchase or half...but all of it! how amazing is that?!

the hotel cafe tour is starting up soon. for those who don't know what that is...the hotel cafe is a famous coffee shop in la known for its performances from established and up-and-coming artists. think john mayer, ingrid michelson, jason mraz, jack johnson, tegan and sara, etc. there's a show on october 11. for those that are interested to go (and for crosstrainers not going on retreat)...let's go!

on youtube...they have romeo + juliet (baz luhrman version) and moonwalker available (both from the same person actually. super random.) in its entirety. if you have a hankering to watch either one but don't own either one (like me)...now you can watch it!

another good watch on youtube...the music video to teddy geiger's "confidence."

right about now and going into the near future...if you see me and notice me moving around to a beat, lady gaga's "just dance" is most likely playing in my mind. hahaha...random i know.

there's an opera debuting at la opera in september called "the fly." if it sounds familiar...it's the opera version of the film (scifi cult classic made famous by the remake in 1986 with jeff goldblum and geena davis). i want to watch it because it's going to very interesting and most likely compelling how the la opera pulls this off.

more randomness: in chris brown's "forever" video during the second verse, his scene with the girl (where he dances about and "raises" the fountain) is filmed right in front of the dorothy chandler pavillion where the la opera is housed. just in case you wanted to know haha.

cassie ft. the dream "nobody but you." it's the kind of song you can warm up to as the weather (hopefully) gets cooler. another radio killer indeed. call the radio and tell 'em this yo song!

in yet another first for me...i did yoga for the first time. invited and encouraged by liz, i tried it out at lululemon athletica. it was a really great experience. even if it was somewhat painful, i'm not that flexible, and i moved and bent my body in ways i never did before...the immense peace and satisfaction that comes out of every move is so worth it. i've been wanting to do yoga and now i have...and now i'm going to do it more and nurture this new passion. thanks to liz for her help and to mod and alex for their incredible teaching.

if anyone wants to go, for the first time or not...it's every sunday at the store 7-8pm.
september 7 9am-11am: partner yoga at the shoppes. if you're down...holla!

one last thing. if his health is good and his doctors give him the green light...sen. ted kennedy may make an appearance at the dnc! that would really be huge for obama and the democratic party. i definitely hope he can do it!

good night!

"tightness."

andrew's hasta la vista fiesta was last night.
it was another testament to how nice
the leelin residence is for a good party.
good food, good people, good music, good laughs,
good games, good drinks, good vibes...good andrew laguna.
it was a good way to spend one last time with him
before he starts the rest of his amazing Jesuit life.

yesterday was a good day to catch up with old friends.
had lunch with liz @ ra who i haven't chilled with in months.
so much has happened in our lives since the
last time we really talked but i'm glad
we're still tight. afterwards...i ran into
my old co-workers melissa and cristina @ peet's.
with an invite from melissa...i came back
to starbucks b&p for the first time and
visited her, lilia, lauren, anthony, and craig.
once again...much has changed
but the connections remain strong.

outside of church...i feel the most in touch
with my humanity at the hospital.
there was one shift where i was at
the nursing station doing some charting
when i noticed a vase of lilies with
a card next to it. the card had this message:

the best things in the world aren't things...
they're people.

all i could do at that moment was smile.
i completely agree.

viva la vida indeed.

"good vibrations."

every once in a while (like yesterday)...i drop by the pomona arts colony and antiques row to do some personal galavanting. sometimes i view artwork, other times i browse and purchase antiques. it's always a pleasant time. i like going over there because it's very nostalgic and very quaint...two things i don't experience on a normal basis. the place may not be the most lush or well-kept area but beauty is still very much prevalent there and i do what i can to enjoy that simple beauty.

for the first time ever...i got a pedicure this afternoon. i went with trina because the past couple of weeks have been rough and i needed to do something relaxing and beneficial. she invited and i obliged. aside from the lack of proper hands and a squeaking massage chair...i had a good experience. and yeah...it was still worth it after being put on blast in front of my other friends by trina.

andrew leaves for the society of Jesus this sunday. first winnie (mary perpetua), then eric burke, and now him (with michelle to soon follow). i'm so proud of the decision he's made as well as the vocation he has chosen for his life. if you haven't done so already...wish him well and send him your regards. an amazing friend like andrew deserves it.

the nike+ human race 10k is just 10 days away and i'm still training. i already knew when i registered for it that i wouldn't be completely ready by the time of the event but i would be good enough to make it to the finish line. i know my back is going to ache, my legs will get sore, asthma will kick in, and all sorts of physical pain will occur...but i'm so excited for the race. running through the streets of la at night. pushing my body past known limits and finishing at the coliseum with kanye west peforming at the end of the festivities. most of all...i'm supporting the united nations refugee agency. this is something i don't want to miss...and something worth running for: a good cause.

"revived."

i was looking forward to coming home early today and relaxing...but i got a flat tire which caused
me to wait around in hemet for almost an hour before getting help from aaa. such a damper to the rest of my manic monday. seriously...after 8 hours of work with stomach aches and sore quadriceps the last thing i wanted to do was get stuck in the desert longer than planned.

yesterday...i decided to become a sponsor (big brother) to a child in need through the christian foundation for children and aging (cfca - check out www.cfcausa.org). his name is juan pedro ejcalon aju and he is six years-old, living in xepatan, patzun, guatemala. his picture was the first one to really stand out to me and while i did go around looking at many others...i ended up coming back to him. i couldn't pass up on my little brother. and so...now i have someone who
is counting on me to support him in whatever way possible financially and with prayers aplenty. i won't let juan down...i'm going to raise him up.

summer revival was a definite great time. fiat had a damn good performance. i'm so happy for and proud of my friends...especially my sister. one of the highlights of my life was definitely their
performance of coldplay's "fix you." oh my goodness...my sister's vocals along with all those
genius instrumentals was a sensory euphoria. finishing off with "don't stop believing" was very appropriate haha. all the other bands (and justin rivera) did well and i give all the finest props to them.

this past weekend wasn't as productive as planned but i did a lot of good things. yambeezy's bbq, martin's surprise birthday dinner, and the impromptu summer revival after-party at yard house gave me the opportunity to not just spend time with my friends but catch up with some i haven't really talked to in awhile. i made up for the lack of sleep i get during the week and i managed to work out after taking the week off (last week was tough). all in all...this weekend may not have been what i wanted...but it turned out to be what i needed.

i accomplished something i've been hoping to do all summer by watching an la galaxy game last thursday night. i went with arthur and paul and we had an awesome time. our seats were close and discounted...double the pleasure, double the fun haha. technically...it was a chivas usa home game but it didn't matter because galaxy fans (like us) were in full effect. i'm glad that the first game we saw was a super clasico. it was exciting to be in the crowd and the experience was classic. david beckham and landon donovan are for real. soccer fans are really like no other. even if it ended in a draw, la won the tournament and we left the stadium happy and wanting more.

two weeks until scrc and the human race!

summer is going by fast...make the most of it before it burns out.

"actualized."

today was a nice day in hemet. i got to see a lot of good things and do a lot of good things for patients and nurses alike. there was a point in the day where i was just randomly touring the hospital and i came about a room where love actually was playing on the tv. it was right at the scene where liam neeson convinces his stepson to not give up on the girl and chase after her. i got to hear my favorite quote from the film..."c'mon dad, let's get the shit kicked out of us by love." the drive to san bernardino from hemet would have been worse had i not stopped by the moreno valley mall. this is how lame i am...the first time i go to that mall and the only reason i went was to buy a cinnabon because i had a craving for it. yeah...very lame. the best part of the day...i aced my remediation final for g.i! i get to continue on with my class. i'm very much relieved and like i said...that was my first, last, and only remediation for sure. now i can focus more on moving along and getting through this program.

summer revival is this sunday at st. paul!
come by and support fiat, justin rivera, and carlo singh!
it's only 5 bucks...suh-weet!

time to catch up on my sleep.

"delighted."

august has been a hard month thus far.
i'm happy that thursdays and fridays
are only 4-hour school days for me
but that doesn't make the
3 8-hour days of clinicals any better.

apart from the usual activities of
patient care, eating cheddar bacon potato skins.
watching morning tv shows like the price is right
and live with regis and kelly, creating
care plans, writing assessments, and
driving around the town...
i was treated with an unexpected delight today.

i just left the cafeteria with a cup of coffee on
my way back to my unit and around the corner
i hear someone singing
(and doing a damn good job of it)
what i think was
the bee gees' "how deep is your love."
i was immediately enthralled and upon
turning the corner i was met with the
beautiful lady that came with the beautiful voice.

we only glanced upon each other briefly and
smiled as we continued on our separate ways
but that moment made my day.
and yeah...now i have something to look forward
to in hemet other than gaining nursing experience
and spending time with my classmates.

my remediation final is tomorrow for g.i.
so it was only appropriate to write a blog
the night before. i'm more scared of this final
than any other final...only because
this one will seriously decide if i continue
on with my class or step down to
join the class below me right now.
i hope to pass and make it out alive.
my future is literally depending on this.

-------------------------------------------

this weekend was one of
the most interesting in recent memory.
the art show was yesterday and it was a success.
i didn't have the time needed to really
create my art pieces so i'm a little
disappointed that i had to cram
just to finish my project.
it was tough but i made it happen.
i do plan on creating another version
of my "victory by virtue" project
in the near future...
which i hope i can do
the right way the second time around.

other than that...
everyone did the great job,
especially john bajet and his
crazy genius art pieces.
props to katrina for hosting the event
and johnny tran for the music.
much love to meagan
for being my muse and
helping me with my paintings.
and thanks to jen for coming through
to check out the scene.

makeshift afterparty at ra...
first time there and it was super chill.
viva la happy hour for
good (and cheap) eats and drinks.

-------------------------------------------

la galaxy vs. chivas usa on thursday!
buddle, randolph, donovan, beckham...
it will be a good game.
i only hope the galaxy can
come out of their slump and
win with cobi jones as the coach now.

for all y'all who may think i just got
into the la galaxy recently...
i've been a fan since cobi jones
(ucla graduate!)
and the team first started
with those (ugly)
green and yellow jerseys.
it's the fact that i now have friends
who love soccer that i can share my
passion with others now.

the beautiful game is (and will always be) on point!

-------------------------------------------

that's all for now.
i hope that by the next entry
i won't have to worry about this
remediation crap anymore.

peace!

"statement."

"i'm happy to have met such a great guy. i think that it is almost impossible to meet someone like him. there are quite a few adjectives that i'd use to describe him, but let's put it this way...if you know me well enough and you were me at this moment, you'd feel (as michelle pfiefer in grease 2 would put it,) 'exciting weird.'"

that definitely made my week.
affirmation like this is extremely difficult to find.

it's been a tough week and i'm glad the weekend is almost here. driving to hemet three days consecutively is miserable...let alone driving there just once. hemet is in the middle of nowhere 20 minutes or so away from the closest freeway. it's in the desert so it's obviously hot. the shifts at the hospital go by slower than ever and i'm more exhausted coming home from clinicals than ever before. it only gets harder by adding all this with all the things we need to deal with in the classroom. august is definitely much more challenging than i anticipated.

the nike+ human race is about 24 days away! i'm getting in better shape and i'm feeling more and more fit. i don't think i'll be completely ready physically at the time of the race but i'll be good to go nevertheless. i wish others were doing this with me but i'm chill with the reality that this will be something i do on my own. it's will be a great personal experience for sure.

the art show is this sunday.
location: Saint Paul the Apostle in Chino Hills.
"VICTORY"
hosted by the young adults ministry.
starts 7:30am and ends at night.

i finally started on my pieces yesterday. i've been incredibly busy so my plans for the art show haven't been a priority. it was nice to paint again and i'm glad to have finished 1/3 of my project. i hope to finish it all by saturday afternoon. it's not going to be the flashiest pieces nor the most visually spectacular...but it will be inspiring. it will be art indeed.

the first crosstrainer meeting of season was tonight. it was great to see both old friends and new faces. i'm glad more people have joined and a good group of people have come back this year. every season is different...but this one will be the most different personally for me. i won't go into every detail (you can check past entries for that) but i will state that i will spend this upcoming year expanding my horizons in faith and nurturing my passion for God and to help others in many ways. i will miss many meetings and retreats...but i will still be a crosstrainer nevertheless, because this is the time that i prove it more than ever in the world and beyond the ministry and the church.

-------------------------------------------------

to all my friends that i have not been able to chill with much,
haven't seen in awhile or talked to, and/or have experienced
anything negative in the course of our friendship/connection...
i apologize for my part in those circumstances and situations.
i've been carried away with my work regarding school
so i haven't been able to be the friend i want to and should be.
i miss out on so many things and i hope you will all understand.

don't worry...there will be more days off in the fall and
i'll be down for more adventures
once school is done with at the end of february.

-------------------------------------------------

thanks for reading...good night.

"out of sight."

i had an amazing time last night.
the blind date went extremely well.

i kinda already knew who she was
but it was still a surprise.
jen (i know i know) was
a very impressive and chill date.
it was easy to get comfortable and
even easier to just go with it.

the first part of my plan couldn't happen
because there wasn't enough time
so we instead bought latin bracelets
at marc jacobs in melrose
then went over to hollywood and highland
and galavanted over there.

after browsing a hollywood star map
and walking a grip of city blocks...
we found audrey hepburn's star,
which was very much awesome!
there were other stars i was glad to come across...
like frank sinatra, bing crosby, lucille ball,
la dodgers, walt disney, and the
victoria secret angels (hahaha).
i also got to see the egyptian theatre
for the first time which was cool
because that's where the first
movie premiere took place...
a little hollywood trivia.

we made our way over
to the americana at the brand
and had dinner at katsuya...
which was one of the best dinners
i've had in recent memory.
good food, good service, and aesthetically pleasing.
the americana was love at first sight for me...
it was such a surreal and beautiful place
and i'm definitely coming back for more of it all.

that's about all i want to say about the night.
like i said...it was a great time indeed.

here's to social experimenting!

"boundaries."

first day back to school was chill.
up until september 9...
i'll be going to hemet monday through wednesday
and thursdays/fridays are 4-hour days.
i'm glad i'm driving somewhere closer
than victorville for clinicals.
i may not get to see any operations and what not
but it's going to be interesting and educational nevertheless.

--------------------------------------------------

last night was meagan's birthday dinner that
ashley and i planned out.
actually...it was her idea and i eventually
planned it all out haha.
it was stressful to say the least to do everything
so close to the wire but it all worked out.
dinner @ kitayama ---> red mango --->
treasure island park in laguna beach --->
jane's corndogs and seaside donuts @ newport pier.
meagan had a good time, it was a good group of people,
everything eventually fell into place, and
everyone seemed to have enjoyed the night.
i'm glad to see a good friend of mine enjoy a good birthday...
everyone, especially my loved ones
(and more especially the ones that are royalty haha),
deserves that.

--------------------------------------------------

the word is officially out...
i'm going on a blind date tonight.
it's been awhile since i've been on a date and
even longer since i've gone
on one and actually call it a date
(because a date can be a date without it having be called one).
i never thought i'd go on
a blind date and here i am now.
it's going to be quite interesting
and i'm very excited.
no matter what happens...
it's going to be a good night. trust.

well...i'm off to do my thing.
good luck doing yours.
live well and prosper!